Can I share something with you?

No, strike that. I’m going to share something with you.

I’m sick of Christmas carols.

Not in my normal “If I hear ‘The Little Drummer Boy’ one more time, someone is going to die–and it won’t be me,” way.

A few out of the ordinary holiday songs can usually lift me out of that mood.

This year, not so much. I mean, it’s only December 2nd, and I’m at the point where not even Lefty curling up in my lap and purring until his ears–and mine–vibrate does the trick.

I’m not sure I can take another three weeks of “I’m here in prison/the army/quarantine and won’t be able to guzzle eggnog/open presents/smooch my sweetie this year, so you all have a great time without me” songs.

Have you ever noticed how much thematic overlap there is between the non-canonical Christmas songs and Country music? I’ll admit I hadn’t until just now. But I digress.

It doesn’t help a bit that the SiriusXM Forties channel has been replaced with their holiday music channel. If I want a little Gene Krupa or Cab Calloway, I have to fall back on my own music collection! Oh, the horror! The inconvenience!

Yeah, okay, I exaggerate for effect.

But I’m serious about the carols. I don’t usually reach this point until around the 22nd or 23rd.

I’d blame it on reaction to COVID-19–a desperate attempt to establish some normality in the face of the current-and-impending surge, but really, nothing in the onslaught is any different than it was in previous, virus-free years. And, while I’ll cop to a certain amount of virus-imposed weariness and ennui, that doesn’t seem relevant to Early Onset Carol Intolerance.

Hmm. If this malaise to get any significant attention from the medical community, it’s going to need a better acronym.

Am I alone in this suffering? Or is anyone else out there in the same position? If so, should we form a mutual support group?

“Hi, I’m Casey, and I only disemboweled three carol-spouting speakers today. And none of them were human.”

Maybe we’d better each go this one alone.