Google Photos can be scary.

Not their facial recognition, although that can be startling.

Certainly not the automatic grouping of photos by date and location; that’s downright useful.

No, I’m talking about the Assistant function. I think The Algorithm gets bored sometimes.

It’ll find similar pictures and stitch them together into an animated GIF, or apply some crazy color scheme and call it a “stylized photo”. Most of them are useless, and I just delete them.

But every so often, it’ll decide one of the cats isn’t getting enough attentions, and it’ll go to a very weird place.

A couple of days ago, it decided Yuki was feeling neglected, and as a result, it created this.

Google Photos. Don’t neglect your cats.

2 thoughts on “Neglect

  1. I love it! (My Google Asst makes the GIFs, but nothing like this. I provide plenty of cat photos … maybe I got one of the lazy assistants.)

    Also, (and this is related, I promise) (well, related-ish) now that Virginia is out of the NCAA tournament — and by “now” I mean … out in a historically heartbreaking way back on Day 1 … I’m rooting for Michigan simply because of the profile in the NYTimes this week on freshman Jordan Poole who likes … no, loves … no, really, really, really loves … cats. Good enough for me.


    • Sucks being on the wrong end of History, doesn’t it? But, yes, Mr. Poole seems worthy of the attention. To the extent that I follow the March Mayhem (not at all), I shall join you in rooting for Michigan.

      As for the videos, well, if you’ve got a reasonably current version of Google Photos on your phone, I can’t think of any reason you shouldn’t get the occasional movie. Perhaps to need to mistreat your crew a bit. Make them wait ten minutes between them demanding food and you providing it. Limit petting sessions to no more than three hours. Introduce “No Ear Skritching Saturday”. If that doesn’t give you a feline in desperate need of attentions, I can’t think what might.


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