Hey, remember way back in 2013, when Grumpy Cat endorsed a line of coffee drinks?

I said at the time that it was a bad idea for three reasons:

  1. Cats don’t drink coffee, so how can they endorse it?
  2. Grumpy Cat’s schtick is that she* hates everything, so endorsing something dilutes her brand identity.
  3. “Grumppuccino” is a hideous blot on the English language

* Yes, Grumpy Cat is female, a fact that Maggie has to remind me about periodically. I hesitate to consider what my inability to remember that says about my underlying assumptions about feline personality and gender roles.

Now* it turns out there’s a fourth reason why the move was a bad one. The relationship has degenerated into a lawsuit.

* For sufficiently broad definitions of “now”. The lawsuit in question was actually filed late last year.

According to Grumpy Cat’s suit, Grenade Beverage LLC, the company that produces “her” iced coffee drink, has not only begun selling unlicensed products (ground coffee), improper use of the domain, and failing to report sales of the Grumppuccino product line.

Let’s be clear here: cats, by and large, don’t have proper standing in American courts to file lawsuits. The suit has been filed by the Grumpy Cat brand, rather than Grumpy Cat herself.

Which is a shame, really. It means we’re unlikely to see Grumpy Cat take the stand when the suit comes to trial. Assuming it does, of course. L.A. Biz reports that the judge is moving toward entering a default judgment in Grumpy Cat’s favor. Barring a surprise, it sounds to this layman as though the case will be concluded this month.

Then we can look forward to years of Grumpy Cat’s efforts to collect the $600,000 (possibly $1,800,000 if the award is tripled). Now there’s something to be grumpy about!

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