So now we know. Yesterday Google announced that the next version of Android will be the deliciously un-crossmarketed “Lollipop”. It’ll roll out around the beginning of next month along with several new devices (more on those in a moment).

Last year, I suggested that this would be an unsponsored release and implied that I thought Lollipop was the most likely name, ahead of the ever-popular Lemon Meringue Pie. So a point for me. We’ll see if the next release is indeed co-branded with Mounds candy.

On to those devices.

We’ve got the expected new phone. Or phablet. The Nexus 6 ups the stakes in the size battle. At 5.96 inches, it makes Apple’s iPhone 6 Plus look tiny. Forget about putting it in your pocket. Consider yourself lucky if it fits in your backpack.

We’ve got the expected new tablet. A nine inch (OK, 8.9 inches if you’re going to insist on precision) model, it’s clearly intended to compete with the iPad Air: slightly lighter, front-facing speakers, multiple colors, etc., etc.

Apparently, Google considers the seven inch form factor to be obsolete. Don’t want a nine or ten incher? Great, get a phablet. All models of the Nexus 7 are showing as out of stock in the Play store, and there are no indications that they’ll be back. That’s a shame. The larger models are, I’ll admit, better for video–I use my iPad for most of my video needs–but seven inches is, IMNSHO, the perfect size for ebooks and web browsing. Six inches is just a little too small to get enough letters on the screen at once to keep up with my reading speed.

So, no upgrade for me this year. I’ll wait until next year, when the size war brings the new phones to seven inches.

Google’s final device announcement yesterday is the Nexus Player, because the world really needed another streaming media player. From what I’ve seen, it’s basically an Android-powered tablet without a screen: install any standard Android app (primarily games, presumably, though of course it’ll come with the usual selection of Google apps, including the media players) and display them on your TV. Oh, and it’s got Chromecast functionality, so you don’t have to find a vacant HDMI port on the TV. Unplug your Chromecast, plug in your Nexus Player, and you’re ready to roll. Joy.

That was yesterday. Today, Apple held another product launch meeting. We’ve got iOS 8.1. We’ve got Yosemite, the new version of OS X. (Sorry, Apple, I still miss the big cats. Much more engaging than chunks of geography.) They work together via iCloud. Which is, of course, perfectly safe. (They also work together via Bluetooth and Wi-Fi, which are also perfectly safe.)

Mind you, we already knew this stuff. There’s nothing about the OSes that wasn’t announced at WWDC or the iPhone 6 / Apple Watch launch. The only news is that Yosemite is available today, and iOS 8.1 will be out on Monday.

On to the good stuff (new toys, in other words).

To absolutely nobody’s surprise, Apple’s got new iPads coming. Brace yourself for the iPad Air 2, even thinner than last year’s antiquated iPad Air. Because the most important thing about a tablet is how thin it is. I mean, yeah, it’s faster and has a better camera, it’s got TouchID–but no NFC, so you can’t use Apple Pay in stores. Not that anyone cares about that. The important thing is that it’s thinner! (There’s an unanswered question here: how much does it weigh? Remember, the Nexus 9 will come in at 418 grams, 50 grams lighter than last year’s iPad Air. Weight is at least as important as thickness for long periods of use.)

There’s an iPad Mini 3. It comes in three colors. That’s about all Apple is saying about it.

Moving on.

How about an iMac with Retina Display–yes, that’s the official name. A twenty-seven inch screen at 5120×2880: seven times as many pixels as your HD TV. All the usual spec boosts over previous models. Only $2499–which isn’t that bad a deal if you compare the cost of a 4K TV, or 4K PC monitor. Fans of the late, lamented oviod iMacs will be disappointed to hear that there are still no plans to bring back the rainbow colors.

New Mac Mini. Faster, cheaper.

Is it just me, or are the mini versions of Apple’s products not getting much love this year? I guess they’re just not very exciting compared to the tininess of the Apple Watch. And the lightness of the iPad Air 2.