Poor Watanuki is deeply misunderstood. He has a tendency to lash out unexpectedly — literally biting the hand that feeds him — and push the other cats away from his favorite resting places. As a result, he’s earned the nickname “Knuckles Malloy, Notorious Mobster Kitty”.

Of course, since he’s so deeply misunderstood, he tends to sulk when he hears that nickname. He stalks away to hide, muttering under his breath. Maggie, at great risk to the integrity of her fingers, has transcribed his mutterings.

I don’t know why you keep calling me a “notorious mobster”.

I am not a mobster! I am a handsome tuxedo kitty who is misunderstood — deeply,
*deeply* misunderstood.

Nobody understands me. Nobody appreciates me. I’m gonna go write poetry about you and post it to my blog — then you’ll be sorry!

So far, we have yet to locate his blog, but we suspect that it features a lot of dripping red text on a black background.